Long distance visitation is a pain in the ass. For everyone, least of all you. You have been ordered by a judge to leave behind your friend's, pets, hobbies, bedroom and life for 2-3 months just to make someone else happy. You may have gone along with it for years but by about 12 years old you can begin to fight back against this yearly hassle. And it's easy. Don't get on the plane.
First off, inform your non-custodial parent that you do not plan on attending visitation this summer. Do it via email or facebook or text if at all possible. Be calm and clear. Realize that the other parent is probably going to choose two different responses. Negotiation or Terrorism.
1. Negotiation
Your parent will probably say something along the lines of " I'll let you go home early". Warning, it's trap. Haven't you ever seen a Lifetime Movie? As soon as they get you where they want you then they will never willingly drive you back to the airport. Once they've got you, you're stuck.
2. Terrorism
Expect to hear " I'm the ADULT and you will do as I say!" Oh Really. That's what they think. don't start a fight. Never agree to terrorist demands.
Either answer is unacceptable. You have made your decision. Hopefully you have articulated it in a clear rational manner and now you need to enforce that decision. By not getting on the plane.
There is no need to create a huge scene at the airport. However, the airport is where you want the battle to occur. This fight is not with the custodial parent, so don't make it one. Get in the car, pack your luggage, and go to the Gate. If your non custodial parent is a Terrorist, then he will likely try to throw your other parent in jail. It happens when your judge is trying to be a hardass.. And guess where the courts will try to send you after that.
When you arrive at the gate the next step is to ask to speak to one of the flight attendants. Tell them that you are required to spend time with your non custodial parent and you re choosing not to get on the plane. Expect some resistance. Be clear that you do not wish to cause a scene on the plane, but that you will if necessary. Do not threaten anyone. In ten years from now you don't want to end up on a "No Fly" List.
Expect the airport police to come. Again state your plan to not fly. Ask to leave with your other parent. Your other parent is probably in full on freak out mode. She expected you to leave. She is worried aout getting in trouble. But the truth is, once the flight crew says you can't fly, there is nothing they can do about it either. Don't be the bad guy, call your non-custodial parent and explain that you are at the airport and that you will not be flying today or any other day. You and the other parent may end up milling about for a while, but I guarantee you airport security will send you back home.
Congratulations you have made your stand. You will be in trouble. But you will be in trouble at your own damn house.
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